The Friday Five, October 21, 2011

FIVE PEOPLE YOU DON’T WANT TO SEE IN THE AUDIENCE

For an actor, looking out into the audience during a performance can be perilous. You do not want your eyes to suddenly happen upon the wrong person, an unwelcome acquaintance, a confused or unenthused face. That’s why, over the years, I’ve learned to slightly unfocus my eyes, glazing them over, but without looking completely dead inside. Still, the wrong audience member can easily throw off even a seasoned actor like myself. 

by Matt G of Matt and Kyle and Matt

Here is a list of five people you don’t want to spot in an audience. 

1. Your More Successful Doppelganger. 

Every actor has one, that guy that shows up at all of your auditions. They look just like you, talk like you, except the doppelganger gets all the parts. And now you’ve spotted them in the third row, smugly judging all of your choices. 

2. Your Agent.

Let’s face it, your agent probably doesn’t like you, doesn’t respect your work and is looking for any excuse to drop you from their roster. 

3. Your Future Self. 

If and when you spot your future self, it is hardly ever a good thing. They are usually there to warn you about something, or prevent something from happening. Spotting your future self from onstage will surely throw off your concentration, ruining your performance and thus creating the disaster the future you came back in time to prevent. 

4. Your Doctor.

Imagine suddenly seeing your family doctor in the audience. It would be a huge distraction. You would spend the rest of the performance trying to figure out if it's really him or not, what he’s doing there, if the woman with him is his wife, etc. The fact that he’s seen you naked is no help either.    

5. Dustin Hoffman.

The man’s a brilliant actor and a genius. It’s like doing a crossword puzzle in front of Bill Shakespeare. The pressure’s just too much. Plus, he has a distractingly large head.